As an English person, I have always been proud of my Jewish heritage, until today. I am observing Sen. Ted Cruz address the Republican Jewish Coalition Presidential Forum on BBC iplayer, December 13th 2015.
Paranoid Schizoid anxiety needs to be contained. See Melanie Klein and Wilfrid Bion.
First tutorial and my next move is to find out what is meant exactly by terms such as ‘hierarchy of forms’ (possible idealism?) and ‘truth to materials’ (and possible…)
Design as emergence?
Research the actions and subsequent marks I make? The ‘pouring’, the spilling out, the expulsion/projection and the result.
A ‘repulsion/attraction aesthetic’. Dismaland, I guess.
And I have a multi-modal practice as an artist. But that’s not surprising considering the amount of part personalities I have. Probably why I have to make sense of my world by putting together parts of a jigsaw whenever I come across something new to me.
I also want to say thank you to everyone who engaged with me today, a lot of them poorly as ’tis that time of year. It was ‘good enough’.
I am very naïve to think that global politics would be that easy. Those in responsible positions must have to contain so much anxiety, rage and frustration that it must be difficult not to get caught up in childish or adolescent fears and behaviour.
Third week back at college and I am still completely discombobulated.
You may have seen bits of ‘sculpture’ on this website but with paint and glue I have been exploring further. It has become more organic than designing an image in my head. It has been squeezed out. But it has also become about a place in the world, where it belongs or is situated, what it is made of, steel, plastic… What is easier to mould. I can not mould my sculpture in plaster or recreate it in clay, I can not reproduce it. But I can turn it into something else. Herewith photos of photo of me!!!
I am glad that a dialogue between Putin and Obama has begun, whether the world can exist without only one leader shall remain to be seen. Fuck, I’d be in and out of analysis 5 x a day if I had to do their job. At least, they have Corbyn behind them.
It is my dissertation year and I am going to share the first chapter with you. It is called The Lacanian Impasse? I am going to write 1500 words on this subject, starting from now…There is nothing that the college library facilities can help me with…if anyone has any info on psychoanalytic and feminist theory in relation to the creative process via Ettinger and Kahlo, get in touch!
I got to your Dismaland and at the end of the day I burst into distressed tears. I cried because we had travelled for three and a half hours and queued for five. I was already so very tired. I cried because, being so unprepared for what was to come, we had not eaten. I was so very hungry. I cried because some of the artwork made me feel so very sad but I also cried because I couldn’t win a gold medallion like the man with the megaphone outside. I cried because, as an artistic autist, I could not read the faces of the staff; because I got so confused and because one of them cocked a gun beside me. I started to cry because the noise made me jump; I was terrified. I could hear the words ‘satire’, ‘irony’, even ‘double irony’ and ‘controversy’ swirling around me in answer to my questions. Yet I knew only what I felt. Distress.
In order to digest my experience of Dismaland, my response was to appropriate images of both yours and Hurst’s work into a collage alongside current headline news. I called it Today.
I am wearing my ‘meaningless rubber bracelet’ and just hope that it is made of recycled material and that the proceeds go to a very good cause. By the way, I found a rusty bolt on the ground by the fountain that I brought home for my rusty metal collection. Finders, keepers and I thought that I had earned it. Exit through the gift shop.
Stewart took us to see the Riley exhibition in Bexhill. The wind was up. My thoughts are still to be collected after spending two days with my parents…but we did good. The people in my world did okay today. After 18 months of catching two buses there, I finally managed to catch two buses back. I feel quite proud of myself but exhausted. My dreams have been epic journeys, but I have seen a ‘puffling’ for the first time on TV and I have seen ‘the autistic gardener’ on TV too.
I do not think that George Osborne has served me and my kind wisely in his budget in terms of respect but underneath the earth in London the Cross Rail project is costing 15 billion and we need billions for defences against terrorist attacks. What can he do?!
The artists exhibiting at Bexhill have questioned the way I see and interpret things because both interacted with more than just one of my senses. Stezaker Film Works…creating a sculpture out of film, out of paint because the ‘stills’ I can capture on my camera are so bad, they always lead me to ‘painting’. The bunff says that ‘we are said to be blind to images at 1/24th of a second’ but I do not think that Stezaker meant anything to ‘attest to the opposite’, I think his attention is to disrupt the binary assumption of language in order to enlarge our understanding of the world.
I think sharing information can be a good thing, it does not have to be destructive.